


Bereft in Deathly Bloom

by Kalcifer



Series: FatT Sapphic Week 2020 [2]
Category: Friends at the Table (Podcast)
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-07
Updated: 2020-09-07
Packaged: 2021-03-07 03:14:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 872
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26346208
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kalcifer/pseuds/Kalcifer
Summary: Blooming adjusts to being part of the Beloved Nights.
Relationships: ⸢Blooming⸣/Massalia d'Argent
Series: FatT Sapphic Week 2020 [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1920205
Comments: 2
Kudos: 5





	Bereft in Deathly Bloom

**Author's Note:**

> If you thought that my weird fascination with minor Divine pilots was limited to Counterweight, you were sorely mistaken.

It was so much easier to be an instrument of justice than to be a person. Blooming, who had spent these last months trying to be person-and-god even as her own faith crumbled, desperately needed the break. The Waking Cadent was happy to oblige.

But even in this new and terrifying version of the Mirage, there was only so much for the Beloved Nights to do. They were limited to putting out those fires that the Cadent could predict or intercept, and even then she had to be sure intervening wouldn’t interfere with her overarching mission. The hours between crises stretched before Blooming, voids where, when she was not training, or throwing herself onto her mattress for snatches of dreamless sleep, she did nothing but practice subordinating her identity to her goals.

She didn’t know how long she’d spent in her latest round of self-annihilation when she was pulled back to the kitchen by the sound of Massalia entering the room. They carried themself with the distracted arrogance that meant they were in mental contact with Melodica. That was a good sign. Maybe they’d ignore Blooming and let her get back to ignoring herself as well.

Of course, she wasn’t nearly that lucky, and never had been. Massalia did a double-take when they saw her, looked unsettled for a moment, then came over to sit beside her. 

“What are you doing here?”

“Same as you, I imagine,” Blooming said “Passing the time until our next assignment as painlessly as I can.”

She half expected Massalia to give some off hand agreement and walk back out. Instead, they raised one sculpted eyebrow. “Is that really all you want out of this? Painlessness?”   
“The point of being here is that I don’t have to _ have _ higher goals. The Cadent directs me, and I work to bring about her vision. Anything more is unnecessary.” And exhausting, too. Even this conversation was more than Blooming had the energy for. She thought about resting her head on the table.

She didn’t get a chance before Massalia spoke again. “That’s the opposite of the point. Being the first to ally ourselves with the new Cadent means that we can make names for ourselves, can set a path for the future and ensure that we’re remembered alongside the other great people of the Divine Fleet.” They’d been gesturing expansively, but their attention abruptly came back to her, sharp and judgmental. “You’re content to waste that chance wallowing in your own pitiful despair.”

Blooming could tell they were trying to provoke her. The Blooming of only a few months ago would have raged at the mere suggestion that she wasn’t doing enough as it was. That Blooming had died with Independence, though, and this one wasn’t willing to pretend to be her. She couldn’t even summon the energy to mourn her. She closed her eyes, exhausted. “Empyrean’s death took too much from me. I’m barely suitable as an instrument of change, but I can at least be that much.

“Are you claiming you don’t have enough identity left to care about anything that happens to you?” Massalia’s eyes were lit with strange intensity.

Blooming nodded.

“Prove it.” They leaned in until their face was mere centimeters from hers, the challenge clear in their eyes.

Blooming could feel the situation slipping out of control, but that was par for the course these days. At least this one was likely to be pleasant. She closed the gap with a pressing, insistent kiss.

Massalia made a satisfied noise. They were going to be insufferably smug about this later, she was sure, but forming thoughts had been an effort even before their tongue slipped into her mouth. There was no way she’d be able to convince them this wasn’t a victory now. All she could do was take them down with her. She tangled a hand in their hair, taking satisfaction both in ruining their aloof elegance and in the sharp inhale they took in response.

Eventually they pulled back. Their smirk couldn’t hide how flushed they had become. “There,” they said. “That didn’t seem like the work of a simple tool to me.”

“It was painless,” Blooming allowed.

Massalia frowned. “That’s it?”

“I enjoyed it.” Blooming realized the truth of it as she said it.

“I thought so. You were far too enthusiastic to simply be enduring it.” Massalia’s haughty words were at odds with the look of relief on their face. “I think that’s proof enough that you’re capable of wanting things for yourself.”

“It’s not the same thing.” Blooming wasn’t ready to start thinking about the future just because she could take advantage of a good thing when it was presented to her.

“Maybe, but it’s a start. And if you need more encouragement, I’m happy to give you an incentive. I’m sure it’ll be better than sitting in an empty room staring into space.” They gave her a flirtatious look, but Blooming could see the hint of concern underneath it.

“I’ll keep that in mind.” Blooming gave a tentative smile of her own, if only to reassure them. She didn’t need their pity.

Still, this evening had been better than she would have expected. She might even call it nice.


End file.
